Sickness entitlement

Jess saw my Greased Lightnin’ lyrics when she pinched my Perypils newsletter to roll her cigarette on. She read them out loud whilst her customer was on hold. They are quite complicated; I mean “Palomino dashboard and duel muffler twins” doesn’t trip off the tongue very easily, and I don’t feel very comfortable singing “You know that aint no shit we’ll be getting lots of tit”, but I’m sure with some practise it will be fine. Jess said I ought to pull a sickie, so I could rehearse properly. I didn't want to get into trouble,but she said you were allowed to have 5% off as sickness. I tried to work out my attendance rate whilst changing a customer's address for them. They weren't very grateful, complaining that we kept getting it wrong. Jess worked it out for me in the end - she reckoned I was entitled to be off sick for two days, and that would take me to 4.8%, so I wouldn't get into any trouble. Great! I texted Myra to see if she wanted to rehearse with me tomorrow and she texted back to say she would, straight after Jeremy Kyle.